I Can't Come to Conceive

David writes:

Hi there, my wife and i are trying for a baby, but i cant come during intercourse, when i masturbate its no problem, I last managed to climax during intercourse 3 weeks ago, can anybody offer any tips or advice?

Yin's Answer

This is most likely related to the stress and pressure of trying for a baby. Sex is no longer just for fun- it has a purpose - and that can sometimes change the way our bodies react.

You might not be aware in the change of feelings but in the back of your mind you could be thinking about the important task you are undertaking. This can add pressure and stop you from fully relaxing enought to climax.

The fact that you are acheiving orgasm during masturbation means there is no physical problem and it's probably just in your head.

I suggest you try relaxing and taking your time over sex. Don't forget it isn't meant to be enjoyable and not purely for the point of conception. Spend a night in just being close to eachother and taking it slowly. That way when the time does come to climax you will be having so much fun that you will forget all about the life changing mission you are on.

Yang's Answer

Trying to make a baby is a wonderful thing - but it's not exactly a thought that will trun you on. As Yin said- this is most likely down to the pressure of your swimmers needing to hit the jackpot. You need to relax.

A lot of couple who are trying to conceive tend to see sex as a task that needs to be done and get into a routine of having sex purely to produce a baby. There is no need to think of things like this.

Just because sex has a purpose doesn't mean it can't still be hot! Try experimenting with some new positions or exploring each others fantasies...this will take your mind off all the pressure and make sure you are still enjoying sex. Making a baby isn't always as easy as we believe but at least you can be having fun along the way!